When I was preparing for living in Haiti and working at Middle Ground, I knew that I would face some difficulties. However, I did not expect that we would watch so many babies join Jesus in such a short period of time. The past few weeks have been, for lack of a better word, difficult. In addition, I am finding it incredibly painful to find the words to describe what I have been experiencing.
We have not lost babies due to something that we could have done, but because these suffering children did not make it to us in time. I think that this is the hardest part for me. It is incredibly frustrating that so many different obstacles are against malnourished babies receiving the care they need.
Lack of knowledge of the signs of malnutrition is possibly the biggest factor, along with sheer lack of resources. It is beyond heartbreaking to hear that a parent who would give the world for their child is not able to save them from hunger. Not because they do not care, or don’t try hard enough, but because they did not know. Or even worse, they just don’t have the resources in order to protect their child from unimaginable pain.
Hearing the shrilling cry of a mourning mother will forever be the worst sound I have ever heard. It is a sound that rings in your ears long after it is gone.
There are many different ways that people process all of these experiences and emotions. My first emotion was sadness and confusion. I have also learned that I need to work hard to not jump to anger at the injustice that is such innocent souls losing the fight to malnutrition.
The one and only way to soothe these thoughts is to remember the truth given to us by Jesus Christ. No matter how much pain and agony these babies felt, they are now wrapped in the calm, loving embrace of our Father’s arms.
Send Me 
Remember God is training you for greater things and will hand you more then you handle.
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AMEN! Sorry you are seeing so much tragedy.. Remember we all love and care for you back in Minnesota and God loves you too. Bless you for the work you are doing and the babies you are saving! Katie
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Sophia,
You are learning and experiencing so much! It is good you are writing about it; that will help you process it all! I will pray for you and for the mamas in mourning.
Love Auntie Mimi
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Sophie, Reading your blog often brings me to tears and so I have to choose carefully when I’m going to read them because I’m pretty much a basket case for quite awhile after. You have a way of writing that puts such vivid pictures in my mind–I feel as though I’m there watching, seeing, feeling, even though I know it’s only a tiny bit of what you are experiencing each and every day. As a Mom and Grandma, the loss of any child, any age, hurts my heart and soul and is JUST WRONG! Too often in our society these little babies are forgotten or thought of as less valuable and not worthy of news reports and headlines. Where are all the news stories of outrage for these babies??? Thank you Sophie for serving our Lord and His children!
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Thank you so much for reading and following my journey. I really appreciate hearing that it has had an impact as I often feel like I am writing more to process things for myself than to actually share. I completely agree that it is wrong how so much is happening and the world barely knows what is happening. This is exactly what I am learning about throughout my stay though, that it is so important!
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